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myHealth Blog: Bouncing Back From Setbacks

Updated: Jan 8

Hi and welcome to this week's 50 & Beyond Health & Wellbeing blog. Each week I will provide you with knowledge, tips, advice and recommendations to inspire you to sustain good metabolic health specific to being over 50. Chris Deavin, myHealthCoach

98% of people will fail to keep to their New Year's Resolutions. And it is not just New Year's Resolutions that don't get achieved.

Think about how many times you have set out to achieve a vision you have about the health, fitness and strength you want to have. Have you ever achieved that vision?

How does that make you feel?

Do you become stressed when you don’t succeed in achieving what you want?  The very reason why failure and setbacks damages so many egos, breaks so many hearts and steal so many dreams may lie in how resilient you are to pressure.

Resilience is characterised as being able to adapt to and bounce back from tough situations without compromising your objective.  Being able to bounce back quickly from any setback, instead of dwelling in self-pity, allows you to get on with your life and keep working towards your target.

Focus on the upside

Why does a setback hurt so much?  Is it because it makes you feel like a failure? 

Is it because you feel as if you are not good enough and that no matter what you try, you aren’t going to succeed?  No.  Setbacks hurt when you focus your mind on the pain.

By refocusing your mind on the empowering aspects of the setback instead of the painful ones, you will bounce back quickly without feeling drained by the event.

What you focus on, regardless of the outcome of the situation, will determine whether you feel confident and self-assured or irritable and depressed.

Tip: Pay attention to the aspects of the situation that you felt good about.  Focus on the aspects that did go well. 

Did you apply yourself well?  If so, then be pleased that you did that!  Were you proactive and used your strengths? 

Well, that takes courage, so if you did that, then be proud of yourself.   

Did you give your best effort?  Then, that’s all you can ask of yourself, so acknowledge yourself for having the confidence to be your best.

Acknowledge how you feel, but don’t dwell on the setback.  Why waste your time focusing on something that hurts? 

It won’t get you any closer to what you want.  It sounds harsh (because it is), but you have to tell yourself,  ‘Get up - Get over it – Get on with it’.

Is it a disaster or a learning experience?

Look at setbacks as a stepping-stone that points out the path to where you want to go.  In that sense, the setback is actually a helping hand that shows you the way that didn’t work so that you can find what path will work. 

Without knowing what doesn’t work, how can you expect to grow and improve?

Tip: Describe your setback experience in empowering terms instead of ‘put-down’ language. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, look at how it is showing you the way to getting what you want. Ask yourself:

‘What can I learn from this?’

‘How can this situation make me stronger, smarter or happier in my life?’

‘What do I know now that I didn’t know before the situation?’

‘How will this outcome help me improve in my next challenge?’

Becoming resilient to pressure is a choice of how you wish to react to the obstacles and setbacks that life throws at you. 

Now it’s up to you to decide whether you will let failure and setbacks stop you in your tracks and wallow in self-pity or whether you will see the positive learning and focus on what you have done well so that you can keep on trying until you get what you want from life.

It’s your move.


Meet Your Coach

Chris Deavin, Owner, myHealthCoach

I have been working as a Health Coach for over two decades now, helping people from many backgrounds improve their overall health and well-being, achieve life goals and become more successful in their professional and personal lives.

My coaching approach is very client-centred, placing each client's goals, wants, needs and desires at the heart of my coaching. I have only succeeded in my own life and business for so long because of the success of my clients. If they are not successful, then nor am I.

By having a very personalised coaching approach, my clients feel that I will work tirelessly to help them achieve the goals they want and believe in what they want to achieve.

By helping 100’s of clients over the years, it is that experience that helps me succeed where many other coaches fail. Yes, it is important to be highly qualified and recognised in the field of coaching, but it is the ability of a coach to implement what they know that ultimately leads to a client being successful.

As your coach, I bring a wealth of experience and knowledge to the coaching relationship. I have experienced what works and doesn’t when creating and implementing the right coaching plan for my clients.

Please email me at with any health questions you have or if you require more information about myself and the health coaching I provide.

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